Sketchbook project

Here's some of the artwork from my Sketchbook Project submission. A thoroughly self indulgent tale of misery and woe, completed over 2 nights at the very last minute (having had over 4 months to sort something out).

Nuddy women

I have been paying strange women to take their clothes off.

Lips on her face

I once met a woman

Looked a lot like this

 Had the kind of lips

You just wanted to kiss

--

Then one day she just left

No note, no trace

I wonder what happened

To those lips on her face

Aurora Borealis

Recently I went to see the northern lights in Iceland. My camera wasn't up to the job of registering what I ended up seeing, so I thought I would try and draw what I saw instead.



Here are a few attempts to remember.

IF - Separation

Illustration Friday - 'Separation'

There is so much I could post on this topic right now, having just been through one of the worst periods of my life.

But I wont.

Musn't grumble eh?

Reverb10 - Vive la resistance!

I have been reading the prompts with increasing feelings of unease as the pattern of vomit-inducing positivism seems to get worse and worse. I almost gave up, started to look for other online communities which might offer more varied and challenging subjects. However after a few days I thought - what the hell, give it a bit longer. Maybe can have a little fun with all this. Inspired by reading posts and comments from others who feel equally, if not more so, enraged by the sneaky self-help cod philosophy invoked by the prompt authors, that has become my challenge - turn all this positive energy back around onto itself, and create something more destructive and dark!

Its funny how since I started doing Reverb10 I developed a real hankering after black metal and industrial music, something I haven't really listened to for a long time (mostly been pretty quiet folk music the last few years). Like watching the students stand up for themselves, it kind of takes me back to the good old days, gives me a warm feeling inside. I am feeling strangely energised by the malicious feelings that are being provoked here. For that I can truly thank the organisers of this initiative.



So, with all that off my chest, here are my brief entries for the last few days:


> Community.

Where have you discovered community, online or otherwise, in 2010?
What community would you like to join, create or more deeply connect with in 2011?

Well, I found Reverb10 this year, with all its scary, brainwashing traits. Thankfully there seems to be a kind of growing anti-schmaltz Reverb10 sub-Community out there which I would like to be part of, and see develop into something altogether more evil!
-------------

> Beautifully Different.

Think about what makes you different and what you do that lights people up. Reflect on all the things that make you different – you’ll find they’re what make you beautiful.

OK now this one really made me want to vomit. First reaction was to photoshop a turd. Or maybe this was written by an electrocutioner... now that would make sense. But, wait - oh joy of joys - it seems that the author of the prompt has written a book about all it - to help poor lost souls like myself. Its called 'The Beauty of Different'.

If only it was full of photoshopped turds.




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> Party.

What social gathering rocked your socks off in 2010? Describe the people, music, food, drink, clothes, shenanigans.

Hmmm, I do not seem to recall being invited to any 'social gatherings' this year.

I have been known to 'remove' my socks whilst making a kind of rocking motion from side to side when precariously balanced, when the weather is rather hot, it is sleepy time. However I cannot recall there being other people involved, or any particular music, food or drink.

As for shenanigans, we gave those up a long time ago didn't we dearest?
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> Wisdom.

What was the wisest decision you made this year, and how did it play out?

Not voting Lib Dem.
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Reverb 10 Prompt 4 - Wonder

December 4 – Wonder. How did you cultivate a sense of wonder in your life this year? (Author: Jeffrey Davis)

This prompt really got me worried. It seems to imply that we all have to 'cultivate a sense of wonder', all very prescriptive and new agey. I started to think that, after the other therapy-like prompts we have already had, that this Reverb thing might be some marketing scam to sell some kind of hideous self help book by a one a semi-religious con artist guru type.

So I waited a few days.

[admittedly I didn't get much time to write anyway during those days.]

And after reading the later prompts I thought - OK - so maybe not all of the prompts are pure evil, give it a bit longer, see what I can get out of it. So that's what I am doing.

If I don't like a prompt, I will say so or ignore it.

After all, its not as if anyone is actually reading this anyway apart from my partner, so I can pretty much write what I like -

arse
balls
smelly poo face
knob cheese
and
gubbins!

Now that was therapeutic!

.

Arse-gubbins

Reverb 5: Let Go

December 5 – Let Go. What (or whom) did you let go of this year? Why?

I haven't let go of anything. I have steadfastly not done anything of any major significance this last year that anyone would be able to term creative or innovative. I have endeavoured not to cast off the shackles and heavy weights which stop me from moving, developing and enjoying life, and have grown to accept and love them for what they are - an integral part of my being.

Indeed I have tried very hard to cling in desperation to the things that mean a lot to me. For example each time I swing my son around by the hands I am petrified I will let him slip. Equally I have tried very hard to hold onto other things such as relationship, friends, job, sanity, and sandwiches.

Yes, sandwiches. Chip sandwiches. Or chip butties as they are properly called.

You see, even when the bread is a bit old and starts to break up I will always try to get a good bite before the chips start to spill out the side. People say I am mad. They say "Paul, that chip butty is a mess. Throw it away and start a new one." But I try and hold it together for a bit longer, to get the last good bites of vinegary potato bready goodness out of my fist and into my mouth before the whole thing collapses.

Maybe it is foolish of me. Maybe I should move onto something different. Try using wraps. Pitta bread perhaps. If I was so inclined I may just say to hell with it, and just go and eat my bread and chips separately. Who knows - it works for some people. I've seen it with my own eyes. In posh cafes and in other foreign parts. They seem happy enough. But are these people really that much better off than what I is?

Anyway, enough butty talk. If you really must know, here's what I have really let go this last year.

• My hair (it just started running away)
• My eyesight (bloody computers)
• My health (bloody lazy-arsed me)
• My sex-life (too many reasons to go into here)
  

Next year I may well have to add self-respect, what little confidence I have left, job and money to the list.

And if I do ever lose my ability to enjoy a good chip butty - somebody please shoot me.